"Love is just the skin of knowing"

So I finished reading "The Shack" last week, a book that's getting a lot of buzz from the Christian world. Here's the story; the young daughter of a family was kidnapped during a camping trip and murdered. The father, Mack, who was caring for his daughter at the time of her disappearance, was deeply impacted by this and suffered a great depression. Several years later, Mack receives a note, apparently from God Himself, inviting him back to the shack where his daughter's body was found. The story is about Mack's return there.

The book is a piece of fiction; the story is not true. Young states his reasoning for writing the book; "I was trying to save my kids 40 years! I actually wrote it out of obedience to my wife, who thought I should record the big picture of how I think and what I believe. I did just that, and gave them [the manuscript] in a spiral binder." He also states that, although the story itself is made up, the pain, the longing, the hurt, the questions and the anger are all real.

I found the book incredibly interesting. Originally I borrowed it from a friend, but before I even finished it, I knew I needed my own copy. Young's portrayal of God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit was fascinating and refreshing. His answers to the question "where is God in a world so filled with unspeakable pain?" were wise and insightful, left me wondering, and full of peace and hope.

I do hope, if you'll ever consider reading a book a recommend, that you will pick up this one. Inspiring and worth wrestling through.

"I may be a little tilt-y, but look what I can do!"

OK, so he obviously doesn't have this skill mastered at all, but check Asher out! He can sit on his own like this for about 15-20 seconds before he falls completely over. And only 14-19 of those seconds are spent bent pretty far forward, but the point is that he's sort of actually sitting all by himself! Isn't that wild!?!

Rolling over on the other hand, not interested at all. Boys.

well it's Wednesday, so we all know what that means, right?

I'm sure all my lovely blog readers out there are just anxiously awaiting today's update from our swimming lesson at the Y. Probably even frantically checking to see when a new post will come. I'm sure, right? Oh, no? This isn't breaking news in everyone else's life? Well, here's an update anyways!

Today's lesson, not so hot I'm afraid to say. Asher started crying during circle time, which he never does (I do realize this is only our 4th lesson, and I'm probably not entitled to use words like never quite yet, but I just spent an entire lesson with an upset son, so I'm feeling a little on edge!) But seriously people, circle time? Only 5 minutes into the lesson? What could possibly be so upsetting about circle time?!?. We were able to break off from the group and recover, but the remainder of the lesson (all 25 minutes we had left to go) he was on the verge of losing it. I'm sure if one little droplet of water had of landed where he didn't want it to be, the walls of the YMCA would have been echoing with Asher's lovely cry.

And then (and then) we had the task of getting changed out of our wet clothing in a cold change room. You can probably infer how this went down. Go ahead, infer away. Imagine all of your worst nightmares for going out with an upset baby coming to a head at once. I'll give you a minute.
...

OK, maybe not all your worst nightmares... I mean we didn't lose limbs or anything. Come on, people! But there was lots of crying, screaming, wailing, oh, and a little vomiting. It was lovely.

So this all leaves to me wonder, is this worth it? I mean, Asher does, at times seem to enjoy the experience. And there was that one class where he didn't cry at all. Oh, that was lovely. But then there are these moments, when he is obviously (obviously) miserable, and I wonder if the payoff is worth putting him through that? Maybe it's too early to tell? Maybe he just needs some more time to adjust? Maybe I need to be more diligent about making sure he doesn't get up too early so he's not tired for the class? Maybe?

Maybe this is just my son, a sensitive and expressive little boy, and we have to figure out where the balance is of adjusting to his temperament, yet still having experiences that he can learn from and (hopefully) enjoy. Oh dear, I hope I can figure that out.

Motherhood, isn't it great!?! I will never look at another mom with a crying baby in public the same again (and I think I'm entitled to use the word never this time!)

Not nearly as good as Sara Groves...

There is this wonderful recording artist that I absolutely love to listen to, and her name is Sara Groves. She has this one song on her All Right Here album called "You Cannot Lose My Love" and I sing it to Asher every night. I love the message of this song, and although I don't nearly sound as good as Sara Groves does, I don't think Asher minds :) Here's the lyrics!

You will lose your baby teeth
At times you'll lose your faith in me
You will lose a lot of things
But you cannot lose my love

You may lose your appetite
Your guiding sense of wrong and right
You may lose your will to fight
But you cannot lose my love

You will lose your confidence
In times of trial your common sense
You may lose your innocence
But you cannot lose my love

Many things can be misplaced
Your very memories be erased
No matter what the time or space
You cannot lose my love

You cannot lose
You cannot lose
You cannot lose my love

the exercauser

This week Asher went in his exercauser for the first time. He really likes standing up these days, so I figured he'd enjoy this toy. Check him out! I think he's not quite sure what to make of it.

Tuckered out

Wow, swimming lessons can be so exhausting! Especially when you don't cry, not even once, during the whole class, nor during the entire getting-changed-after-class routine.

Asher has been falling asleep in the car on the way home from swimming every week. Being a baby is tough work, you know!

my beautiful boy at 3 months old

Thankfully I have photographer friends who can help me to always remember the way Asher looked at 3 months old. Here he is, my beautiful, bright-eyed, glorious baby boy with his curly hair, always whisping every which way, full of wonder and life. I love him so very much!