A couple of weeks ago I had the extreme pleasure of sitting down with the women from my parents small group, and a few special guests. As our last small group meeting we decided to invite some mature Christian mothers in to share their experience and expertise. And it was amazing!
These 3 women all have adult children and raised them in a Christian home. They faithfully and honestly answered our questions and shared their wisdom about parenting. It wasn't all glamorous, and it wasn't all peaches. There were challenges, many of them; they had little sleep, they were wrought with worry, they were unsure, they were stretched, and they weren't perfect. But God took what they had to offer as parents, and through their prayers, used it to turn their children into beautiful and responsible people who know Christ.
Nothing they said was necessarily unknown to me, but it was so reassuring as a parent to hear. There are no magic answers, no unknown secret formulas in order to raise healthy, happy people. They all did it differently, with their own traditions and values. They all tried to respond to the unique needs of their children, and loved them for who they were. They all prayed for their children, and had other people pray too. It was complicated, yet simple. It was challenging, yet rewarding. And it was so unbelievably moving, touching, reassuring, and comforting to hear from women who have been there, and who are on the other side of this crazy ride. I can't tell you how much the experience meant to me; it was something my spirit needed.
From this meeting I was also reminded of something a friend once told me, "Love covers a multitude". I believe that if my children grow up knowing that I love them unconditionally, that this will make up the difference in all the ways I lack as a mother. I pray that my love for my boys will cover and clean up all the messes I make on this bumpy ride - do I have any other hope, really? I can't be perfect for them no matter how much I want to, and I can't get it all right, but I can love them. When I rise, sleepy-eyed and disappointed, in the middle of the night to feed my baby - I pray he knows I love him. When I look at my little boy, frustrated and furious over an unacceptable behavior - I pray he knows I love him. And I do pray that in their heart of hearts they will know, "I am worthy and loved" despite my short-comings. I pray that I can communicate that much.
I wish I could be a part of a regular group like this, older, wiser mothers mentoring to younger, still-in-the-trenches mothers. Wouldn't it be amazing if we had this kind of support and resources as parents?
3 comments:
I was thinking the same thing! It would be nice to have some older mothers around to cheer us on.
This is an amazing experience, and one I haven't had enough of either. It is so neat to listen to people who've been there, and have made it through. Glad that you had this chance to be encouraged!
this is the exact reason why i'm having a hard time with the moving back to NB. Every tuesday morning i attend a Ladies coffee hour. We have a bible study for about 30-45 minutes then we pray together. There is such a wonderful span of ages there. There are older women with grown children and grandchilden, women with teenagers, and lots of young moms too. The encouragement and wisdom we get from these women are priceless, i am going to miss them terribly! God told the older women in the church to mentor the younger and i love that they do that at this church!
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